Wednesday, November 19, 2014

A Letter to Tiffani (1996)

Dear 15 year old Tiffani,

I'm writing to you, because the you from the future, me, needs your help. I think, no, I know that there are things you can do now, that will make us a happier Tiffani later on down the road.

I know right now, you think you have it all figured out. You think, you don't need a lot of friends, because your most important friend, is going to be your husband someday. You think that having a baby, with this boy, is going to make you the most important person in his life. I need for you to understand how important it is for you to stick to your goal of attending St. Francis College, and playing volleyball there. Make friends. Make lots of friends. Understand that although "he" feels like the greatest thing that has ever happened to you, you need to learn other people, and establish long lasting relationships with, other people. Enjoy college life, it will shape you into an incredible person.

Right now you're thinking, that you can do it all. Go to school full time, work full time, be a mother, and a wife. I bet it hasn't at all crossed your mind, that one day your body will betray you. You will have pain in places, that right now you take for granted. You will gain weight, you will inherit stretch marks. Be kind to your body. Start now. Eat properly, exercise regularly. Love your curves, and don't be so concerned with what other people think about them. Your body is for you. Your temple. If you take care of it now, it will take care of you later. Volleyball, is great. And you are great at it... But when you make the decision to join the track team, stick to it. Run baby, run. Not for medals, accolades and awards, run for you. 

Right now your thinking, that you can't do anything with out the help of your father.  I'm telling you now, you won't need him as much as you think. He's given you a very important piece of education. He's laid the foundation already. He taught you how to be an independent woman, how to survive without a man, how to do for yourself. It's going to be a long and hard road doing it by yourself, but you most definitely can. Nothing can break you, you are the most resilient person you know.

15 year old Tiffani, don't be in such a rush to be a mother, enjoy your twenties, travel. Learn to love yourself and cherish yourself, before giving yourself over to someone else. Your sanity and well being will be better off. Remember that in order to shape and mold anybody else, you yourself have to be whole, and in love with the person you are. 

Use these things that I've told you. Remember , marriage, your marriage, is a beautiful part of your life. It will be the greatest decision you ever make, but 1st, YOU have to learn to be the best version of YOU, you can be. Learn. Live. Laugh. Love. 
See you in the future!

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