So today was a very eventful day. My parents house was broken into and ransacked. Though most people would be terribly frightened, depressed, or saddened, I, your resident comic relief was armed and ready with my usual wit. I could not help but go on about how dumb the thieves were leaving behind all the "good stuff". Although those morons did get away with two laptops, some jewelry, and a few hundred dollars of loose change my parents had been collecting, the clueless culprits left behind plenty of goods that could have been used to fund, I'm sure, some drug habit. Big screen TV's, crystal vases, speakers, printers, extra sets of car keys, and checkbooks were all left behind wondering themselves why they were overlooked Underwear draws were turned upside down, I'm positive, by the idiot henchmen (you know there is always a pinky and brain type character in these types of scenarios) probably looking for lacey thongs, or crotchless women's wear to wear under his clothes or on top of his head. And while my mother interviewed the neighbors and my father talked with the detectives, I entertained my two sisters. I wondered out loud what would have happened if my parents returned home early for a "nooner" (sick to think about but still funny)? Would the thieves freeze and pretend to be one with the couch? I couldn't help but think...out loud..."Did those bastards make themselves a plate while they were here? They could have touched our fried chicken, watched our cable." I thought. I did at one point become saddened by the fact that they did stumble across and steal my dad's shotgun, but that thought was qickly followed by "Those fools will be on the 10 o'clock news tonight for accidentally shooting each others heads off while trying to pose for a suvounair photo. LOL...now that would be a Karmic ass whoopin at it's best.